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Axe Throwing

Shut Up And Throw!!

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It's been said that the only person who doesn't love throwing axes is a person who hasn't thrown one yet.
You grip the handle, feel its weight, draw it up behind your head. You swing your axe forward, - remembering to follow through. You track for a moment as it spins and suddenly feel very satisfied as it goes "thud" into the middle of its target.
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In your head you whisper , “This is the apocalypse and that was some diseased zombie skull I just bulls-eyed".
In the meantime, no one is going to jump the line at Starbucks. "Seriously asshole, you know how a line works...”
You develop a relationship with your blade as you throw and maintain it. It really does become an extension of you. A mutual understanding that both of you have a future splitting wood and hearing the cheers of your fellow Throwers.
I had considered joining sports leagues in the past, but the most appealing part about joining a bowling league, for example, was the shirts. And frankly speaking, a bowling ball ain't gonna save you during a zombie apocalypse - only delay the inevitable. I also wanted to step outside of my regular circle of friends at the comedy club and try something new.
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In axe league tournaments you are competing against other Throwers, but really it boils down to a competition between you, your axe and that target made out of wood. When throwing one can imagine the target just called you a 'rotten piece of shit'. But it's wrong, you're not a piece of shit … You're an Axe Thrower who's deadly at twenty feet.
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The Bad-Axe Throwing Oath